I used to think anal was reserved for people far more sexually advanced than me. Like a special club of cool, bendy, sexually fluent humans. But the truth is: anal sex isn’t a kink aspiration. It’s simply another place pleasure can live.
The one thing that separates “absolutely not” from “okay wow”? Lube. Your butt doesn’t self-lubricate. It never has. It never will. And that’s not on you… no matter how many inexperienced lovers might tell you otherwise. It’s biology.
So if anal sex is on the menu, lubrication is the main ingredient. Let’s get into the fun part: finding the right one.
Why lube matters more for anal sex
When we talk about anal play — butt plugs, sex toys, fingers, or penetration — lubrication just isn’t optional. It reduces friction, helps muscles relax, and makes the whole experience feel like a choice, not a challenge.
Let’s get into a little bit of anatomy. Stay with me, it’s important.
Unlike the vagina, which lengthens and lubricates when turned on, the anus remains dry and relatively taut. Two sphincters work together to hold everything in place and they definitely won’t automatically relax just because you want to try something new. Lubrication acts like a negotiation tool between those muscles and your curiosity. It allows penetration to happen gradually, without forcing or rushing the body past its own limits.
Lube is your best friend when it comes to anal, both emotionally and physically. It keeps you open, curious, comfortable, and connected. Without it, the body clenches. With it, the body knows it can relax.
Your lube options, decoded
There are a few major categories worth knowing before you reach for whatever’s in the bathroom cabinet. Each has a different texture, lifespan, and personality. Think of them like different lovers: some great for a quick fling, some better for the long haul.
Let’s break them down:
Oil-Based Lube: The Slow-Burn Romantic
Oil-based lubes are lush, long-lasting, and often made with natural ingredients like coconut oil. They’re perfect when touch is as important as penetration. They feel nurturing, not clinical, great if you have sensitive skin or want a massage to melt into something deeper.
The downside? Oil breaks down latex condoms. It can also disrupt pH if you move between anal and vaginal play. Gorgeous for the right moment. A mismatch for others.
Try Our Extra Virgin: Oil-based lube
Water-Based Lube: The Reliable Boyfriend-Material One
Water-based lubes are the most versatile: safe with condoms, silicone sex toys, and all forms of anal play. They mimic the body’s natural slickness and are easy to wash off afterwards.
You may need to reapply but that’s a built-in invitation to slow down, breathe, and stay in touch with each other.
Try Our Playmate: Water-Based Lubricant
Hybrid Lube: The Best of Both Worlds
Hybrid lubricants combine water and silicone — long-lasting like silicone, compatible like water-based. They tend to feel cushioned and luxurious. A good choice when you want to explore without constantly reaching for the bottle.
If you love the idea of extended anal play but don’t want the feel of something heavy sitting on the skin, hybrid might be your favourite.
Cheeky rec: why not try combining your favourite oil and water-based lubes together, for your own frisky cocktail delight?
Silicone-Based Lube: The Endurance Athlete
Silicone-based lubricants stick around. They don’t absorb into the skin, which makes them brilliant for longer or more intense penetration. You only need a small amount.
But be mindful: silicone + silicone toys don't always mix. And it requires a proper clean-up afterwards. Great when you want to go the distance.
Numbing Lubes: The Mysterious One Night Stand
The fantasy of “feeling less” can be tempting if you’re nervous, and there are products to help you achieve it. But I’d argue that sensation is communication. Numbing lubes silence the body’s boundaries… and can lead to injury.
If something doesn’t feel right: add more lube, slow down, or change what you’re doing. Keeping your awareness means keeping yourself safe and increasing your pleasure.
Everything That Is Not Lube
Body lotion, spit, Vaseline, olive or coconut oil. If it isn’t designed for sex, it shouldn’t be used during sex. They can irritate delicate tissue or introduce bacteria that simply do not belong in your butt.
Warming up: where anal pleasure really begins
Anal sex shouldn’t start with a plunge. It’s not a straight into it kind of vibe. It should start with touch. With teasing. With breathing. With muscles softening rather than gripping in self-defence or nervous anticipation.
Preparation might include:
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external touch and massage
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slow exploration with a finger
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a small butt plug
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checking in with what feels good and what doesn’t yet
How to actually use lube during anal play
Put it everywhere something is going or being touched. Outside, inside, on toys, and on your partner. Reapply when friction returns. Keep the bottle within reach! Topping up is part of the fun, not a disruption.
If you think you’re using enough, add a bit more. Anal sex loves abundance.
So… what’s the best anal lube?
The best lube for anal sex is the one that supports the sex you want to have.
If you’re using condoms: Water-based or silicone.
If you’re using silicone sex toys: Water-based (or oil-based with care, depending on the toy).
If you want long sessions or deeper penetration: Silicone or oil-based.a hybrid.
If your skin is sensitive or easily irritated: Oil-based with nourishing, natural ingredients.
If you want touch and connection to feel like part of the foreplay: Oil-based.
It’s not about the “sexiest” lube. It’s about the right lube for you.
Why Tussle lubes make anal sex easier to love
Anal sex deserves products that feel intentional and respectful, not clinical or gimmicky. Tussle formulates for pleasure: natural ingredients where it counts, thoughtful textures, body-safe compatibility, and a clear understanding that comfort builds excitement.
Whichever Tussle lube you choose, oil-based or water-based, the focus remains the same: enhancing connection, curiosity, and sensation.
Because when the glide is good, the experience can be great.
A final note for the curious
Anal play doesn’t make you wild or weird. It doesn’t say anything about your identity or your relationship except that you’re listening to what brings you pleasure.
I’d urge you to try and declutter your mind from all the myths and porn-like representations you’ve had of anal sex in the past, and go into it with an open mind. Like everything to do with sex, anal is different for every body. Go with what feels right for yours.
Your body deserves that kind of attention.
